DMHAS: Frequently Asked Questions

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DMHAS

410 Capitol Avenue

P.O. Box 341431

Hartford, CT 06134

(860) 418-7000

Toll Free: (800) 446-7348

Hearing Impaired: (860) 418-6707

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Problem Gambling Services
Frequently Asked Questions

Who qualifies for your services?

Bettor Choice Treatment Programs are open to Connecticut residents who are having problems with their own gambling or the gambling of someone close to them.

Is there a fee for services?

There may be. Some services are offered at no charge, and others are offered at reasonable fees. What you will be charged, if anything, is based on a sliding scale that usually takes into account income and the number of dependents living in the home. Severity of gambling debt is often a consideration when determining fees. We accept some private and public forms of medical insurance. Because the Bettor Choice Treatment Programs are funded by the state of Connecticut, we never refuse treatment because of an inability to pay.

I am very concerned about privacy. Will what I say be kept confidential?

Your involvement with a Bettor Choice Treatment Program is strictly confidential. No information about you will be revealed to anyone outside the treatment program without your written permission. However, there are some exceptions:

· Records may be subpoenaed, and/or your therapist may be required to testify in court proceedings.

· We are required to report abuse of children, elderly people, and mentally retarded people.

· We are required to report any threatened action that may cause harm or injury to you or someone else.

· We will be required to complete insurance forms, including a diagnosis, if you have insurance and want to use it.

All Bettor Choice Programs observe the privacy protection regulations established by the federal government. At your first visit, we will review how your privacy is protected and your rights regarding your health information.

How often will I come to therapy?

In all instances, we will attempt to meet with you as soon as possible after you first contact us. How often you come to therapy is a decision you and your therapist will make. You will consider the amount of support you need, how much support you feel comfortable accepting, and the amount of time you have. Typically, for clients beginning treatment, we recommend you meet with your therapist once a week. Most therapy sessions last 50 minutes; group therapy sessions run for 90 minutes.

If I start therapy, how long will my treatment last?

The duration of therapy at a Bettor Choice Program varies from person to person. Some of our clients meet with us only once or twice; others stay in treatment for several months, a year, or more. How long you decide to remain in treatment is a decision you and your therapist will make together. Some factors to consider when making this decision are your own personal needs, the seriousness of your gambling problem, and the severity of the emotional, financial, or family problems you face. It is important to remember that therapy at our program is voluntary and you can enter or leave treatment at any time.

Are the Bettor Choice Treatment Programs Associated with Gamblers Anonymous and Gam-Anon?

No. We are professional treatment programs specializing in the treatment of problem gamblers and their families. Gamblers Anonymous and GamAnon are international fellowships whose principles do not permit affiliation with professional organizations. Our treatment approach differs in significant ways from G.A., but we have similar goals and believe that these programs can complement each other. We encourage most of our clients to attend G.A. or GamAnon to find out whether the meetings are helpful to their recovery.

I’m not sure I have a gambling problem. Can I come in and just talk to someone?

Yes. You may be wondering whether you have problems that may be related to gambling. For example, family and friends may be telling you about their concerns with your gambling. Even though you do not agree with them you may want to talk it over with someone who is knowledgeable about problem gambling. You are welcome to come in and speak with one of our counselors.

People in my family tell me I “talk crazy” about gambling. What do they mean?

Many of the gamblers we help tell us how they developed unique ways of thinking about their gambling. During therapy, they learn that these thought patterns are self-deceptive and lead them to gamble even more. Examples of self-deceptions are:

I can “read” a slot machine, so I know when it will pay out.
I don’t have a gambling problem. I have a money problem.
This time I will control my gambling.
I am lucky, so I will win.
I have a “system,” and it will pay off if I can play long enough.
Winning a lot of money will solve my problems.
By gambling and winning, I can earn money to pay my bills.
I can be a professional gambler.
No one understands what I am going through.

Have you ever had those kinds of thoughts? In treatment, you’ll discuss them in a way that will help you honestly determine whether your thoughts have been of benefit--or harm--to you. We can teach you other ways to think about your gambling that can assist you to regain control over your life.

Family members can also use counseling to become aware of patterns of thinking and behavior that hurt more than they help. Therapy can assist them in discovering ways to evaluate how they think and explore new solutions to problems.

I think I’m gambling so much because I have too much stress. Can that happen?

Problem gamblers typically cope with stress by escaping into gambling: When they are overwhelmed by emotional pain, they gamble. Financial problem--gamble. Feel like celebrating--gamble. Family problem–gamble. When a gambler makes the decision to not gamble, for a while he or she will have to cope with all those stressors--and maybe more--without the option of gambling. That is not easy. We can be helpful in sorting out the sources of stress and developing ways to deal with them without gambling. We can teach you new ways of finding relief from stress at a time when you will most need it.

On the other hand, some gamblers “thrive” on the ups and downs, surging emotions, and stress of gambling; that is part of the “excitement” they experience when they are in action. When these individuals enter recovery, they may not be comfortable with a slowed-down lifestyle and can become bored or depressed. We assist them in finding alternative ways of having fun and developing a lifestyle that is fulfilling and exciting without gambling.

I think I need counseling to talk about my feelings as well as the gambling. Can I do that?

Many problem gamblers tell us they have difficulty managing their feelings. Some are overwhelmed by emotions such as depression, hopelessness, and fear. Many tell us about the number of times they thought about suicide before entering treatment. Other clients discuss their lifelong history of sadness, loss, and disappointment. For them, gambling becomes the only way they avoid feeling emotional pain. One goal of treatment is assisting our clients in coping with their feelings and teaching them more healthful and effective ways of managing emotional pain without having to gamble.

Family members, overwhelmed by a loved one’s gambling behavior and trying to manage the family in his or her absence, can be distracted from resolving their own feelings and difficulties. They may share many of the painful feelings listed above. They can also benefit from counseling to assist them in taking care of themselves, not just of others.

I’m a recovering gambler who hasn’t gambled in a while, but I’m having some personal problems and am concerned that I might start gambling again. Can I come to your program to talk to someone?

Certainly. Recovery can be a long-term process, and periods of stress or emotional conflict can jeopardize it. A Bettor Choice therapist is available to meet with you to discuss your concerns, help you assess the risk of relapse, and offer ideas about how you can best maintain your ongoing recovery.

How can therapy help the families and friends of problem gamblers?

Family members of a problem gambler can suffer great emotional and financial distress because of a loved one’s gambling. Therapy can help family members improve the quality of their lives whether or not the gambler they care about gets help. We continue to counsel families even when their loved ones continue to gamble. In our experience, the partner and children of a gambler can regain their self-respect and composure in spite of the gambling problem. They can learn to take better care of themselves, take over the family’s financial matters, and feel more confident in making decisions. When a gambler does stop gambling and enters a period of recovery, his or her family faces learning how to adjust to a new lifestyle and overcome some of the bitterness and insecurities of the past. Family therapy can support the family as this on-going process unfolds.

I care about someone who gambles too much. What do I say ?

A simple and straightforward approach to letting someone know you are concerned is often most helpful. That sounds easier to do than it really is. Not everyone will be thankful that someone cares enough to share his or her concern. None of us can control what a person says or does in reaction to what we say. We can, however, control what we say, how we say it, and where and when we talk to a person about whom we are concerned.

Although there is no foolproof way to share a concern with another person, the following process has worked well for many people. Read through the following examples, and try them out the next time you want to tell a friend that you are concerned about something he or she is doing.

Tell the person that you care and that you feel concerned about the way he or she is acting.

“You are a good friend, and I’m upset because I see you doing things that are really risky.”
“I love you and don’t want you to hurt yourself.”

Tell the person exactly what he or she has done that concerns you.

“Last night you were going to spend only $20, but you lost more than $300.”
“You borrowed $400 from me to gamble with more than four months ago and haven’t paid me back.”
“After we had an argument last night, you went out and lost $600 gambling.”

After you tell the person that you care, what you’ve seen, and how you feel, it is important to be willing to listen to what he or she says. You may find that the person will say nothing. He or she may not have been prepared for this and will not be ready to talk with you. The person may become angry and tell you it is none of your business. Your friend may thank you and agree to make some changes. He or she may tell you about a problem that goes well beyond your ability to be helpful. In all cases, it is important to listen to what the person says.

Tell the person what you would like to see him or her do

“If you are going to gamble, I want you to set a limit for losses ahead of time and stick to it.”
“I want you to talk to someone about your gambling problem.”

Tell the person what you are willing and able to do to help. Responses can range from simply being available as a good listener to encouraging the person to arrange a meeting with someone who can help. If the person chooses to say nothing, let him or her know that the door is open to discuss this at a future time.

“I’m always here if you need a friend to talk with and a hug.”
“I won’t lend you money to cover your losses or lie for you, but I will help you find someone who can help you with your gambling problem.”

Remember, the best time and place to talk with someone about an important topic is when you feel comfortable, are not likely to be disturbed, and have plenty of time to talk things through. It is also important to talk when neither of you has been drinking or using other drugs.

The answer to this FAQ is from the publication “Gambling Choices and Guidelines” and appears with permission of the Minnesota Institute of Public Health.

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Content Last Modified on 4/8/2008 2:47:06 PM

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